I’m feeling increasingly more like a Mom of Men with my two oldest sons both going off to college soon (one for his senior year and one for his freshman year), but my youngest is just starting middle school — so I guess I’m a mom of men and a mom of boys! Besides, sometimes the ‘men’ act like boys – thus, it all kind of overlaps. I wanted to post a link to a blog that I write for regularly so that you might catch up with me a little better. I’d love to post the same blog here, but when I started writing for motherhooldlater.com, I agreed it would be an original blog that I’d write. And my incentive to write regularly is that it’s not my site the way this one is, and if I don’t post regularly, I won’t be asked to continue. This all means I’ve neglected my own site’s blog while writing for another one. The motherhoodlatersite is one that really speaks to me because as a mom boys with a 9 year age gap between the oldest and youngest, I find myself in situations that ‘older’ moms can relate to easily. Yet, some of the blogs still will resonate with moms of boys too.
Here’s a link to my blogs there, including the latest one about boy scout camp. Now the my middle son will be off to college soon, I’m hoping I’ll have the time to spend on writing my MOB blog as well as my ‘older mom’ one. In any case, please check out the link below.
And hang in there!
A fellow MOB, Elizabeth S., had a link on her Facebook page recently to a column a writer and mother of boys wrote to her imaginary future daughter-in-law. This writer’s sons are all pretty young, I think. But she is thinking ahead as I’ve done in some of my writings, and yes — we do think about and worry about that old saying about when your daugher gets married, you gain a son BUT when your son gets married, you lose a son. And “A daughter’s a daughter all of her life, but a son is a son until he takes a wife.” Gag me with a spoon. As my two oldest sons (college and soon-to-be college) get older and move on with their lives, I do indeed find myself thinking about these sayings a lot.
So I LOVE this. Please know that it’s all in fun.
Baseball season got started in March, and my high school son started his senior year on his high school team. Wow. So hard to believe that he will be graduating in a few months. So hard to believe that this is his last season playing baseball. From all that first game of t-ball when he hit the ball hard and ran around the bases the wrong way (going to third, to second, to first) — to those homeruns in AAU ball — to now. It’s been fun and hectic (not sure if they counted that t-ball hit as a Triple or not but they probably did since they didn’t keep score anyway).
Now my youngest son is 11 and just made the more competitive league of our town’s rec department. He is at that age where he is losing his little boy look, and I know I will miss it. Also, as I watch him begin his own baseball ‘career’, I find myself thinking back to when my middle son started playing, and it’s a strange, empty feeling. Don’t really know why.
My youngest has never worn an athletic cup before, but since he wants to play catcher sometimes, he has to wear one. But he has always hated them, has always been so uncomfortable in them. So I went on-line and found what is deemed as the most comfortable athletic cup ever made: the Nutty Buddy. No, I didn’t make that up. It is shall we say, anatomically correct with more room for certain body parts than other athletic cups. We should get it in the mail anyday now. So we shall see.
My middle son’s entire baseball team shaved their heads for a fundraising event for St. Baldrick’s, which raises money to fight childhood cancer. It’s called BaseBald, and is a really neat idea. When I asked my son if he really intended to shave his head, he looked at me like that was a crazy question and replied, “Mom, it’s to fight cancer.” Good answer, son. Good answer. Now if he will just make sure he wears a cap or puts sunscreen on when he is at the beach this week on spring break.
And my oldest son is now a junior in college. For my feelings about that — well, Lisa Belkin of The Huffington Post expressed a lot of what I feel when she wrote this recent blog about her own son’s 21st birthday. Lovely! http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-belkin/raising-adult-children_b_1355283.html
A few days before Christmas, I was quite excited when all three of my boys, ages 20, 17, and 11, said they wanted to go to the outlet mall with me, which was a 30 minute drive up the Interstate from our house. The mall is relatively new, and none of us had been there before. I envisoned us getting there early and shopping for a least several hours before going to a sit-down restaurant for a late lunch. I had friends who went shopping with their daughters, and now, finally, thanks to the Polo and Nike outlets promising holiday deals — I was going to have a shopping day with my boys.
The Polo outlet indeed proved very popular with my boys. They each picked out a few things for Christmas, and then we moved over to the Nike outlet where we bought several more items. But then I saw the Coach store where they sell designer handbags, and I thought perhaps one of those might make a good gift for my mother-in-law. We are not the designer handbag type, but I thought perhaps she might like to have one. And the place was having a 30% off sale on top of already half off prices. I went into the store, as my boys sat down outside to wait. The place was packed! I saw the purse I wanted to get her right away, and then I got in line — a long line — to pay. After about five minutes, my youngest son came inside to see what was taking so long. I told him it would be a while and for them to go look around at some more stores and I’d meet them later. Soon after that, my middle son came in and asked for the car keys — they were going to wait in the car. Well, at least my oldest son might still want to do some shopping. Ten minutes late I was done in the line and called my oldest, who was also in the car. They were ready to go! THAT was our shopping day?? Not exactly what I’d envisioned — but at least I still had lunch to look forward to with my guys. One of them suggested we just go through a drive-thru, and I yelled, “No way! We are going to eat in a sit-down restaurant because I don’t ever get to go anywhere with all 3 of you anymore, and I’ve been looking forward to this!” They all exchanged glances. My oldest said, “Okay, Mom, okay.” like he was afraid I was about to go over the edge.
Polo is having another sale near Valentine’s Day, and I already have it on my calendar. I will try again to have a shopping day with my sons.
I was driving my 11-year-old son to baseball practice last week when I noticed him staring at me from the front passenger seat. I glanced over at him. “What?”
“Nothing,” he said and looked ahead at the road.
“What?” I asked again.
He hesitated a moment. “Well, you’ve got lines right here,” he told me, pointing to the corner of his eye.
Oh, yes, that was just what I needed to hear that day. “Thanks, Jason,” I replied, sighing. “You do know those are just wrinkles, right?” He looked panicked for a second. “That’s okay. I know they’re there.”
“I just never noticed them before, mom.” I nodded. Good God, I guess the wrinkle fairy had paid me a visit during the previous night, leaving one of those little things that just pop up on your face out of nowhere as you get older.
I drove on in silence, thinking that with college and braces to pay for there was no way I could affort Botox or Juvederm. “You still look beautiful though,” Jason said. Amused by the obvious heartfelt effort he was making, I smiled at him — probably creating more wrinkles just in that one facial movement. But it was worth it.